Sometimes things in life happen that are just beyond out control. Take this morning for instance…I sat down all prepared to pound out a few thousand words doling out my extremely unofficial awards for 2013 when a gem hit my inbox that was so far afield, so random, so…amazing, that I had to post it here instead. (Awards will follows in a day or two)
To set the stage…this was a completely unprovoked rant, and is unedited in any way from me. It came in, I read it, immediately asked if I could post. She replied and gave her blessing, provided she receive proper credit for it.
And w/ that, I give you one woman's ongoing battle w/ trying to maintain a sanitary workplace, courtesy of C$…
You know what? I'm tired of pretending to know how to use those automatic papertowel dispensers. I don't. They're created by sneaky people who just like to see others with drippy hands scuttling about trying desperately to wave their
drippy mcdripperson fingers like fools in front of a sensor which is clearly premarked as “working only occasionally, in the right lighting, at the right time, depending on the moon.”
Frankly, there is no classy way to gingerly flap drippy hands before an automatic papertowel dispenser in the company of others. It just can't be done. You end up smiling and making some awkward comment about the water pressure of
the sink faucet, while flailing at the socially acceptable minimum before a red light that blinkingly taunts you by making a sound, but not relinquishing a single papertowel. And let's face it, you probably didn't even understand how
the precursor automatic faucet worked either.
Then, just to add insult to injury, as you glance behind you while
simultaneously brushing your damp hands along your hips like it's no big deal,
you see the other lady who judgmentally eyed you while pretending to be patient,
walk right up and obtain two spanking dry papertowels– one for each hand.
To set the stage…this was a completely unprovoked rant, and is unedited in any way from me. It came in, I read it, immediately asked if I could post. She replied and gave her blessing, provided she receive proper credit for it.
And w/ that, I give you one woman's ongoing battle w/ trying to maintain a sanitary workplace, courtesy of C$…
You know what? I'm tired of pretending to know how to use those automatic papertowel dispensers. I don't. They're created by sneaky people who just like to see others with drippy hands scuttling about trying desperately to wave their
drippy mcdripperson fingers like fools in front of a sensor which is clearly premarked as “working only occasionally, in the right lighting, at the right time, depending on the moon.”
Frankly, there is no classy way to gingerly flap drippy hands before an automatic papertowel dispenser in the company of others. It just can't be done. You end up smiling and making some awkward comment about the water pressure of
the sink faucet, while flailing at the socially acceptable minimum before a red light that blinkingly taunts you by making a sound, but not relinquishing a single papertowel. And let's face it, you probably didn't even understand how
the precursor automatic faucet worked either.
Then, just to add insult to injury, as you glance behind you while
simultaneously brushing your damp hands along your hips like it's no big deal,
you see the other lady who judgmentally eyed you while pretending to be patient,
walk right up and obtain two spanking dry papertowels– one for each hand.
HA!