First, I had somehow let two – plus weeks pass w/o an update on here (again), and second, I had failed to give proper deference to the biggest news to hit the Stevens clan in some time, which was the arrival of my nephew Austin Robert a couple of weeks ago.
(For context, you must remember that my niece Maddie was the first girl born a Stevens in THREE generations. She is wonderful, and spoiled rotten, and we all love her to death, but everybody knew it was only a matter of time before the law of averages won out and another football player joined the mix)
Allow me to remedy both…but before we do so, please watch this Doritos commercial from this year's Superbowl. (No, I am not Peyton Manning and acting a corporate shill here….I am merely priming the pump for the story to come)
When Maddie was born, my sister-in-law spent a whopping 13 hours in labor. Think about that. Ouchie. To quote the great Larry the Cable Guy, I give up on a poop after twenty minutes, and she shoved on a watermelon for more than half a day. Eesh…
While that must have bordered on a hellish torture the likes of which I can't imagine, it should be noted that it wasn't the most fun for those of us sitting in the waiting room that long either. Neither straight backed chairs nor tile floors were especially designed for extended periods of lounging, meaning everyone was more than a little uncomfortable.
This time, Pop and I figured we would play things smarter. That morning when my sister-in-law went into labor, we all swung by the hospital to visit and wish them well, let them know we were right outside, would be there whenever Austin arrived. Over the course of said conversation though, Pop and I told my brother that we had no intention of waiting 13 hours again.
Knowing the poor kid couldn't go anywhere, he hammered him relentlessly. Asked where his golf clubs were stored so we could go hit a round. Told him we were going for a crab legs dinner (watching that kid go to work on crab legs is something akin to watching Rembrandt at his easel…a true master.)
And then we told him since we had the truck, we were going to hitch up the boat and hit the lake for an afternoon of fishing.
Apparently, those were the magic words.
Remember the commercial above I had you watch? Well, at the moment we mentioned hitting the water, things were at dilation level 5. Just 17 minutes later, Austin was out. As in….jumped five different stages and made his grand appearance.
“PawPaw and Unka D are going fishing?!? Not without MEEEEEEE!”
And really, who could blame him? He's already been hearing epic fishing tales from his father for the last nine months….it's about time he start getting out there w/ us making some of his own. 🙂
